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twenty fourteen

23 Jan

Over and over again when new year comes, all of us would say “My new year’s resolution is” and so on. Was there a thought of having it fulfilled? Inch by inch we always ask ourselves if it was even started.

Many people has their own bag of stories and bag of what they have in mind. My twenty fourteen story began great and almost ended up miserable.Let me start it monthly..

January started good, started so right and ended better. Better in a way that all of the things came unexpected, blessings came and motivations went high,situations, happenings made me a better person and in realized that there are true to us that made us better. February is pretty much the same. Yeah, pretty much the same I say, though I started it very good and warming and still ended it so well. March, yes! it’s March and it’s okay..April, well, summer! A bit of “sadness but more of an “awesome”. Well, April started cold. Literally cold! summer capital was just one of those things and of course, i was not alone. It was so special, well my travel has always been special with you. It went well until unexpected things happen, a part of your life passed but I never left, I was always with you, the warmth of my hugs, my kisses and my love, is all that I can give and of help..Yes! it’s April, beaches and travel. May, hmmm, I guess May is just May, nothing’s really because, weekends are just there. June, yeah, bigger responsibility. What should I say, well, our home was just another home of our family, yeah! my family came in double. children with hard heads. Literally hard heads, nothing is unusual. July!! a month full of happiness and a bit of sadness. It was your first time and believe me, my smile is way too wide while writing this part of my story, I have alot in store for July, and that bag of happiness went all the way to Boracay, yeah! 4 days of happiness, 4 days felt like 4 years and that 4 days did I not imagine ended for 4 days as if I don’t want it just 4 days but I wanted it to be all the way until the end. Oh well, I just wanted to remember that always, I still have that in my imagination of eating, swimming, dealing with the sun until it sets yet dealing with the wind at night, then, go home, watch tv, sleep and that so called “Duyan”. You have no idea how wide my smile is right now. Okay, let me tell you the bit of sadness, July was also the month where, friends leave. I won’t have to tell more because, i am still getting the hang over of that Boracay. August, a month full of tension at work. Controversy? I don’t think so, there are some people not on our side and that makes us , well, not inclined. September, what should I say? It’s my birth month and that’s the end of the month story. October, I guess, the highlight was, it was a birthday of my travel partner. It was also the month where a big part of our lives passed away and we bid farewell, this was also the month where i decided to leave my comfort zone because that August Tension is growing. November started pretty fine, my family visits another family, we travelled north(again), we climbed upto Baguio to feel the breeze and see their first times, slept over night at a very small condominium good for 4 yet we were 20. ahahaha, that was an experience! On a serious side, November was not so great at all because it was devastating, a cruel month. There was a point that I have not been eating properly, at times that I don’t know where am I going, at times that I wanted to end my life slowly, it was too bad, to think that there is a plan of going to one of our favorite places, Tagaytay, but all was gone. November was also a month that I realized that Stories can be so true not even you knowing that it may have a core issue or may be of false claims, that day, I know, and I know, that I know my self very very well. That day, people that I befriended with, are the same people that will kill me because of stories of other’s stories. November was never a good to me, it wasn’t. December, holiday is almost there, bigger problems arise and fewer solutions is at hand, i felt like I was alone, felt like there is no one to listen, felt like I am talking to my self, that feeling was just intense. In reality, yeah, there was a hope, a hope that I know will just be a hope, it was inconsistent, there was a feeling of it..But I stayed true, I stand by myself, if it will, it will always be. Honestly, December wasn’t so felt for the holidays. Problems came forth, I struggled financially, emotionally and spiritually. My mentality was estranged but I still fought and yet still fighting. Now it’s 2015 and I am in the process of a new beginning, to set things alright and to start anew. Let 2014 pass and pray it won’t happen. Let this year a prosperous year.

And that…That alone…was my twenty fourteen…There are lines I left to end the this story…I always wanted to be with you..

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Posted by on January 23, 2015 in photography

 

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